Mother's Day

Mother's Day is two weeks away and I look forward to hearing from my children, and there will be the usual Mother's Day cards, flowers and gifts. It is a great time for Mothers to feel the love, but it brings a sadness that I can not do the same for my own mother. She died two years ago, at the ripe old age of 91, and I miss her vitality and spunk. What a great icon she was to the spirit that never dies in us, no matter how old we get. I want so much to emulate her, yet my body is not holding up half as well.

Esther Schmidt was a marvel among women. A tribute to what we can achieve, at any age, if we have the spirit to move forward. Widowed at 54, with three pubescent children who did their best to test her every day, she moved forward with grace and dignity nonetheless, and continued to achieve goals few have ever accomplished.

She took on three adoptive children in her late 30's, who challenged her with unwed pregnancies, marriages that were up and down, selfishness, and oftentimes ungratefulness. Although we all loved her with all our hearts, we each presented her with challenges she took in stride - loving us no matter what.

She elevated herself from a clerk at the local Selective Service office (1960s) to Regional Director of Selective Service in Indiana, until the department's demise. Along the way she helped many young men to stay out of Vietnam with legal deferments, and well as encouraging as many as she could to continue their education, all done from home after hours. I watched her cry as she sent the boys off to the induction center, knowing many of them would never return. It was not an easy time for her, no matter what people thought.

After Selective Service was eliminated, Mom found it hard to find work. She was middle aged and had no formal education past high school. It was harder in the 70's than even now for women to make enough money to support themselves on one income, much less try to take care of a family. She persevered.

When my younger sister graduated from college she took a job in New Mexico. My mother moved to nearby Albuquerque then to live with her sister, who had moved there years earlier due to health problems. Mom resided there until her death.

It was in Albuquerque that Mom came into her own. She had always been a stickler about weight and weight management (something she could not seem to instill in us) and started working out at the local Senior Center. It wasn't long before she was teaching aerobics, and sometimes aquatic swimming. She was the oldest employee of the State of New Mexico, and was teaching aerobics at four Senior Centers in Albuquerque until she was 89 years old!

It was amazing to watch a woman who (to me) only seemed to like Lawrence Welk, make her own music to exercise to. She would play and replay, mix and remix (something I can't even do) COUNTRY music until she could get it right. She formed her low impact exercises according to the music, and learned all she could about what would help seniors and what could hurt them. What an amazing site! She even taught me and my children the "Boot Scooting Boogie" and a couple other line dances. Not too many grandmas were that cool!

She entered and participated in the Senior Olympics, was featured in several national magazines and local newspaper articles, and was a constant amazement to those who met her. When she took a group of seniors to a local high school to demonstrate in front of teenagers their jaws hung open. She was a wonder at any age, and indeed an inspiration.

My own children are grown, and some have children of their own now. They were lucky enough to get to know this amazing lady, and learn from her. I hope that their children can say the same thing about me someday.

About the Author: Toni Lawrence is the owner of Celebrate Milestones and Shadow Wings Consulting. She is a mother, grandmother, entrepreneur, freelance writer, bookkeeper and political activist.